“I got your ice cold water! And it’s only one dollar!”
If you were at Otakon 2011 for any length of time, you are not only familiar with the above words, but they are tattooed onto your brain.
From Thursday through early Sunday afternoon, one of the numerous beverage vendors lined up along Pratt Street outside of the Baltimore Convention Center is standing out from the rest. More ripped than Major Armstrong, clad in sunglasses, shorts, and (why not?) a weight belt, the vendor enthusiastically sings over and over into a bullhorn the following chant:
“I got your ice cold water!
And it’s only one dollar!
I got your ice cold water!
And it’s only one dollar!
I got your ice, ice,
Cold, cold
Ice, ice
Cold, cold
I got your ice cold water…”
The chant appeared to be set to the theme from “Mighty Morphin’ Power Rangers.” Peddling nothing more than half-liter bottles of Nirvana brand water, his simple yet unique approach to advertising drew crowds and their cameras. At one point, even Otakon staff members were seen filming his pitch for inclusion on the website.
“Can I autotune you?” an attendee in the crowd asks, his Droid already recording.
The man behind the bullhorn goes by the name of Josh. He and his wife Candice, who assists with sales, are Baltimore residents and were also present at Otakon 2010, sans musical chant. During their four sixteen-hour workdays outside the convention center, the couple estimates that over 100 cases of water were sold. “Honestly, I’ve lost count,” Candice says. At twenty-four bottles to a case, this translates to a gross profit of close to $2500, minus the Baltimore street vendor fees.
During Otakon’s hiatus, Josh’s day job is living proof as to why he is so overzealous about hydration.
“Personal trainer,” he says before turning away to complete another sale.
He may be a quiet man when it comes to conversation, but Josh was noticeably appreciative of his new fans. He posed for photographs, performed for rolling video cameras, and never forgot a “thank you.” Before long, otaku passing by were giving the pair loose singles simply because of his notoriety.
His chant was being repeated by attendees. Pro- and anti-“ice cold water guy” messages were filling up Twitter, Tumblr, and Facebook. Weight belts were flying off of local sporting goods store shelves, quickly becoming part of last-minute cosplay outfits.
OK, I made that last part up. Nevertheless, the fact that Josh and his catchy chant were circulating around the Internet like Google Plus invites could only mean one thing: he’s on his way to becoming the next meme. Cries of “ice cold water!” could very well replace “Marco!” or “Buttscratcha!” at future conventions. Heated, misspelled forum and Twitter debates will form over the exact words in the chant and to what melody it was set. And finally, Otakon enjoys a new stake of popularity that is NOT a fire alarm.
Meet Rachel, an attendee from Allentown, Pennsylvania. She has the distinction of purchasing the very last ice cold water from Josh and Candice. She laughed and admitted no real reaction when informed that she helped close the chapter of the net’s latest celebrity.
As for Josh and Candice? The batteries were removed from the bullhorn, the cooler’s lid was shut, and off they walked, presumably to watch “Mighty Morphin’ Power Rangers.”
(Very special thanks to Lauren Orsini, who helped me out immensely with this post; do yourself a favor and check out her site, for her writing pwns all that is pwnable)
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